RILEY AND STAR MY MALTESE KIDS

RILEY AND STAR MY MALTESE KIDS

Thursday, March 25, 2010

DEAR STAR WITH PRETTY KITTY AND BUFFY PUPPY MAGAZINE.


Hi Everybuddy, It's me Star, from PRETTY KITTY AND BUFFY PUPPY MAGAZINE. My oh my! I have received so many questions this week from kitties and pups asking for my advice. So I am going to post one DEAR STAR, column today and another one early next week. I wouldn't want to leave anybuddy out and I just luuuv your questions! So fasten your seat belts cause you are in for a ride!



TESSA FROM OREGON WRITES: Dear Star, I work very hard taking care of my mommy who is disabled. Butt, when she is resting, I get very lonely and I NEED a little puppy to play and snuggle with. My mommy isn't sure she is able to care for two pups but I know that I can take care of both her and a new puppy butt, how do I convince her?




DEAR TESSA: A new pup would be nice butt, what you need is an older dog about four years old who is big and strong and can take care of both you and your mommy and the heavy work around the house. When you are pooped out, he can give your mommy foot massages and then play and snuggle up with you. He will be loyal and a good Watch Dog and he will watch over you and your mommy and keep you both safe forever!


ANONYMOUS WRITES: Dear Star, I luv my pawrents and my little sis but I miss my girlfurrend Tessa sooo much! All I can think about is moving to Oregon to be with her. Butt, her mommy says she is too young to get married. How can I convince her mommy that this would be a good thing?


DEAR ANONYMOUS: Not to worry, I just took care of it! You should be getting a call from Tessa's mommy any minute now. And no need to thank me, it was my PLEASURE!



MYRTLE WRITES: Dear Star, My furrend Gertie and I go to the park every Sunday and sunbathe and try to meet guys. I'm a hot chick butt Gertie is a TON OF LARD and thinks she looks good in a bikini. It's so embarrassing! And not only that, but she refuses to get a bikini wax and just look at her legs! She has no shame! At this rate, I'm never going to meet Mr. Right! How can I tell her to cover up without hurting her feelings?


DEAR MYRTLE: I'm afraid that you are the problem my dear. It's obvious that you are a prude! If you want to meet guys then you need to loosen up and take off your tops or else, you're going to end up with that flaming flamingo!


KISSA-BULL SAYS: Dear Star, Do you think synchronized toots from all of us will make Bella feel better after her heartwormy treatment? We just want her to feel better fast!


DEAR KISSA-BULL: I say get out the gas masks then toot outside! And whatever you do, don't light up a cigarette!


BAILEY FROM: MARTHA AND BAILEY WRITES: Dear Star. Whenever we are out walking, I never get to be in front! Martha always has to be first! I am the oldest and the bravest so I should first!


DEAR BAILEY, Your problem is very simple, just kick her in the bum from behind! Would she rather be first and buttless? I don't think so? So there you go, now you're first!



MANGO THE MALTESE KIDDO WRITES: Dear Star, I haven't had a chance to express my love to a beautiful girl and now I hear she has a boyfriend! And it looks like they are deeply in love! What should I do now, leave them alone or kidnap her? DESPERATE PUP IN TEXAS.


DEAR DESPERATE PUP, What a shame! Looks like she's the one that got away! Butt not to worry, cause you are a handsome little pup and you will have no trouble finding a girl to love you very soon. By the way, have you met Gertie? Just a thought. Things always work out for the best so cheer up and whatever you do, DO NOT KIDNAP HER! Her mommy will be very sad and you will get in trouble with the law!


Well Everybuddy, that's it for today. I really enjoyed answering all your questions and because of you, I luuuv my job!

Please feel free to ask me a question when you leave your comments on my post to DEAR STAR, Editor of PRETTY KITTY AND BUFFY PUPPY MAGAZINE.


And remember, Relationships, Beauty and Fashion are my Passion!

Luv,
Star.

Labels:

43 Comments:

Blogger Cocorue said...

dear Star,

what would we do without the two of you wise dawgs????? i thought i would let you rest a bit but i really cannot keep away as without you i think i will just die....errr, of shame!

i am in lust, err in Love with someone's fiance......yes, he's engaged to this,....errr, this Fudge Candy and i KNOW he's got a roving eye....check Him out here

http://loveofchester.blogspot.com/2010/01/wafflin-wednesday.html

he's got a thing for chocolates and i don't mean just the milky ones! i KNOW he's keen too BUT.......

Question: How do I let him know that it's NOT too late since he's Not married yet??????
I really don't fancy being known as the OTHER wodawg!
If he Barks that he's NOT KEEN at all, I WILL move on But until then...........

desperately seeking your wise advice,
Coco
pee ess: pls Lord, steer him over here

March 25, 2010 at 6:48 PM  
Blogger Tweedles -- that's me said...

I love the advise that you give ,, but I really wanted to know if you make house calls?
love
tweedles

March 25, 2010 at 7:12 PM  
Blogger Life With Dogs said...

It's going to take me a week to get the vision of those cats out of my head! :)

March 25, 2010 at 7:46 PM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

Hi, Dear Star!
I liked a lot your advice to Tessa and "Anonymous" Haaa! Very good!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

March 25, 2010 at 7:48 PM  
Blogger Tessa the Maltese said...

Dear Star I just LOVE your idea! I just know that it would be perfect for my Mom and me. What I am concerned about is Riley's ah I a mean Anonymous' Mom. I think she would miss Anony so much and not be able to let him go all the way to Oregon.

Besides all of that I do believe that Anony's little sister would not know what to do with herself after a while. I believe that she would be very lonely, like I sometimes am.

On the bright side Mommy is very excited about the foot massages. She says that we might be able to negotiate on that fact alone!

Thanks for everything Star, Hugs, Tessa

Pee S... Riley, how much is air fare from Texas to Oregon? Maybe we could split the
difference. Kisses to you my Brave and Studly pup!!!

March 25, 2010 at 7:49 PM  
Blogger Sierra Rose said...

Star!! Can't believe the questions you have to answer!! You are so wise. Great answers!!!

Hugs and snaggle-tooth kisses,
Sierra Rose

March 25, 2010 at 7:51 PM  
Blogger Jazzi said...

Star, Such great questions and such good advice. You did a wonderful job and keep up the good work. WHat would we all do without you here for us??

Smiles
Jazzi

March 25, 2010 at 8:13 PM  
Blogger kissa-bull said...

oh star that was furry smarticles of you
i guess we should'nt toot near the stove anymore eighter
teehee
pibble sugars and wee wags
the pittie pack

March 25, 2010 at 8:22 PM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky And Sometimes Her Mom said...

I khan't wait to see how Martha and Bailey handle your pawesome advice!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra

March 25, 2010 at 8:37 PM  
Blogger Chester said...

Hiya Riley and Star! I'm glad you told me to stop by-I suspected that my Sweet Coco was the one askin' for advice. I admit, the temptation is a strong one-just look at her!!! My fiance, Ms. Truffles is the love of my life but I am engaged, not dead so I admit to havin' second thoughts. She failed to mention another older wodawg that has feelin's for me also, Godiva who lives only an hour away from me. There seems to be a trend in girls with Chocolate names that are attracted to me like a bear to honey. Maybe I am the one that needs your outstandin' advice! I'll be glad to hear your thoughts for I truly admire your wisdom and need all the help I can get.

Woofs and lovelorn slobbers,
Chester ;0=)

March 26, 2010 at 2:47 AM  
Blogger Abby said...

Hi, Riley & Star...

Star: Another great column...You are sooo wise for such a tiny little girl...

Riley: Ummm...Star hasn't started packing your bags has she??

Abby xxxooo

March 26, 2010 at 4:39 AM  
Blogger Madi and Mom said...

OMC...I'm a cat and the kitties in multiple tops will haunt me from now until doomsday....
Great post and wonderful answers to very difficult and complex questions. Star you are truly outstanding in your field.
We can't wait for installment #2
Madi and Mom

March 26, 2010 at 4:43 AM  
Blogger Marvin -The Hollow Hound said...

ha ha! Although I think those cats in the photo were wearing way toooooo many bikinis!

Happy Weekend, Keep on with the Good Advice.

Advice is Nice.

lotsaluv Marvin xxxxxx

March 26, 2010 at 7:22 AM  
Blogger BRUTUS said...

Love the kitty bikinis!! BOL! And more great advice too, of course!

Snorts-
Brutus the Frenchie

March 26, 2010 at 8:00 AM  
Blogger Nadine said...

Hahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Please excuse our Mom, she can't stop laughing!

Waggles & Chi kisses, Chewy & Lilibell

March 26, 2010 at 8:54 AM  
Blogger Brind'Amour said...

Hi Star and Riley! Great column and great advice. I'd love to be your new friend!!!

Wiggles,
Brind'Amour

March 26, 2010 at 11:53 AM  
Blogger Dory and the Mama said...

BOL....Watch out Riley....

Smileys!
Dory

March 26, 2010 at 1:02 PM  
Blogger Remington said...

Another great job, my little princess! Call me!

March 26, 2010 at 2:06 PM  
Blogger Olive said...

You need a weekly call in show on NPR!!
BOL!!

TAG you are it!!!

Licks from me!

Olive

March 26, 2010 at 2:29 PM  
Blogger Gus, Louie and Callie said...

Another awesome column Star. We loved it..
Hey you know what zoomies are, it is when you both go tearing after each other running as fast as you can. The best place for zoomies are in the house but don't tell Mom...

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus, Louie and Callie

March 26, 2010 at 2:52 PM  
Blogger RILEY AND STAR said...

HI guys!

Ooooh, that game? We do play Zommies! Our favorite place is on the bed when mommy and daddy are trying to sleep!

Luv,
Riley and Star.

March 26, 2010 at 3:00 PM  
Blogger Maggie and Mitch said...

You absolutely give the BEST advice, Star!
We lot the lavender background on your blog! It's very pretty!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

March 26, 2010 at 3:45 PM  
Blogger Twinkietinydog said...

BOL Thanks for showing me how it's done well, Star! Did you hear? I'm getting Ali Z's column. I loved her column and she just gave it to me! I can't imagine doing as good a job as you or she, but I'll try.
Twinkie

March 26, 2010 at 4:28 PM  
Blogger Sapphire said...

hello! u guys are already on my bloggy list! sapphire sniffs you (:

March 26, 2010 at 5:13 PM  
Blogger The Army of Four said...

Great column! You are as wise as you are gorgeous. But I'm not hitting on you. Unless that would be OK with you.
Play bows
Zim

March 26, 2010 at 6:45 PM  
Blogger Chester said...

Dear Star-I am back again because I just have this notion that you can put an end to this cravin' for Chocolate that haunts me night and day. So as you know, I have my fiance, Ms. Truffles, then Godiva showed up (who is also a former show-dog), and now Coco who is the sweetest Coco to ever come down the pike. Why am I locked in this Chocolate pattern? Do you think if I dyed my fur blonde that I could attract girls of other colors? I would make sure to use Pawreference by LoReal, because I am worth it, but am not sure if this would change things or not. Maybe I should swear off girls and become a priest. Or maybe I should become a sheik and they could all be the start of my harem. As you can see this has taken over my thoughts and my life. I would be most grateful for any and all advice you have to offer.

Woofs and yours truly slobbers,
Chester ;0=)

March 27, 2010 at 2:56 AM  
Blogger Mango the Maltese kiddo said...

Oh Star thanks a bunch for your smarty advice. You told me don't kidnap her cause that would upset her mommy, I respect that. Butt you didn't tell me to leave two lovepups alone, hehe!
Gertie? Is it the sunbathing chick that I saw?
She's beautiful and maybe...high maintenance?
My mom says until I could bath and shave myself, don't dream of chasing girls no more, *sigh*.
Love you all.

March 27, 2010 at 6:34 AM  
Blogger Samantha said...

You are soooooo wise Star! Can't believe that you have so many good solutions for so many up your sleeve - you doo a great job for my fave magazine heheh! LOVELOVELOVE the kitty bikini picture - lotta chuckling going on over here! Thanks for your great advice! Have a good weekend!
Hugs xoxoxoxo
Sammie

March 27, 2010 at 7:01 AM  
Blogger Agatha and Archie said...

HAY!!! Did you ever think of getting your own TV show? If so let us know we know people in the business( Archie was an agent once) and maybe we can help..Love A+A

March 27, 2010 at 8:01 AM  
Blogger Snowy and Crystal said...

*hehe* thanks for the giggles ^_^

Have a pawsome weekend.

wet licks

S&C

March 27, 2010 at 8:16 AM  
Blogger Ruby's Raiser said...

Ha! That cat picture is priceless!

Thanks for visiting our blog, we're very excited to make some new friends! Our bestest cousin across the miles is a beautiful Maltese and we don't get to see her enough, so it's fun to come here and visit with you! Looking forward to reading about your adventures. :)

March 27, 2010 at 2:30 PM  
Blogger Noah the Airedale said...

Here we are...sorry we havent been by lately.
Now about those cats....they are just frightening !!!!!

Noah Willow Tess Lucy

March 27, 2010 at 2:54 PM  
Blogger Twix said...

Star you are amazing! You give the best advice ever! So....I have a question for you. I have some hair loss issues and they don't really bother ME so much as they do my MOM. How do I convince her that its not a big deal or how do I get my hair to grow back in? I'll try to post a photo so you can see what I mean.
Love ya!
Snuggles,
Twix

March 27, 2010 at 5:33 PM  
Blogger Murphy's Mom said...

Loved your advice and photos! Thanks for stopping by to say hi! I will check in often!
Anne Landers has nothin' on you!

March 27, 2010 at 11:07 PM  
Blogger Persephone and Buster said...

hi star & riley... we've stopped in to see what's happening...and we find the "advice" sign out! very interesting advice star, you are obviously a trained advice giver. a special talent -- we don't have any questions but we'll fur-sure stop in and ask them when we do.
theBUSTER, Ms.Persephone & Ms.Blue too

March 27, 2010 at 11:31 PM  
Blogger 3 doxies said...

Watch out Daer Abby, there is a new girl giving advice. I's just love your mission to make our world a better place.

pees: Can someone post a list of whos dating who cuz I getting all confused.
Puddles

March 28, 2010 at 2:49 AM  
Blogger Madi and Mom said...

Happy Sunday Riley and Star.
We will pass on your good b-day wishes to my mom. She was very very sick this time in 2008. We are indeed blessed to be celebrating her b-day and reasonably good health this year.
Hugs and Kisses,
Madi and Mom

March 28, 2010 at 6:38 AM  
Blogger DoDo and MoMo said...

Hello Riley & Star! <3 We are from Singapore. ^^

March 28, 2010 at 6:46 AM  
Blogger Matilda said...

Hi Riley and Star!
Thank you for coming to my blog!
My mom and I are very happy to meet you!
You two are really cute!
Kisses
Matilda

March 28, 2010 at 7:24 AM  
Blogger JackDaddy said...

Well how come I never got a subscription notice for this magazine?:)

March 28, 2010 at 9:35 AM  
Blogger Raising Addie said...

WOW you guys have been very busy!

We LOVE you spring header picture!

We hope you are enjoying this wonderful spring weekend, minus the wind BOL

Lots of Luv & Kisses
Addie, Lucie and Hailey

March 28, 2010 at 11:03 AM  
Blogger the booker man said...

hiyas miss star and mr. riley!!
thank you a ton and a half for coming over to visit my bloggie! i'd love to be friends!
miss star, i'm super excited to see that you are like the best advice giver evarrr. i have a feelin' that you are gonna keep me out of troubles with my mama. heehee. oh, and i have a question! what is the best way to convince my mama to let me snooze on the couch??? i'm totally missin' out!
*woof*
the booker man

March 28, 2010 at 5:33 PM  
Blogger Deborah said...

OMD, that was pawesome! Now I know who to go to with my doggy or kitty problems!
LOL

March 28, 2010 at 6:26 PM  

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